Have you ever noticed that sometimes, the harder you try to make something happen, the harder and harder it gets to make that thing happen? For example, when I write for this blog, the harder I work to find the words that I want to write, the harder it is to write. I think they call that writer’s block. It is also because I am by no means any sort of biblical scholar, so I have to work harder to find what I am looking for when I write. And also because I have a horrible disease called perfectionism. And that, despite the fact that I also know there is not really any such thing as perfect in this world. As soon as we reach what we may think is perfect, we find something better.
I think my struggle with faith is kind of the same way. Too often, I forget about simply having faith that God’s plan for me will work out. Even worse than that, the harder I try to have faith in God’s plan for me, the more I end up stressing and worrying about how things will work out. I guess it is kind of like when I have trouble getting to sleep, and the harder I try to sleep, the harder it is to get to sleep. If only I could let my mind go and not think so much about things.
I remember a coach from my childhood who would always say “don’t think.” As an athlete in a game, let’s say basketball, so much of the game is just knowing what to do and how to react to the defense because of the training that you have gone through at practice. Instead, you need to just do what comes natural, read and react to the opposing team’s defense, and make the play. If you overthink the situation, you are more likely to make a mistake or let your guard down and allow the defense to come in for the steal.
If only I had the same level of faith that Abraham had. Here is this man, who had to wait 100 years before having his first child. He finally has his first child with Sarah, and he is commanded by God to take that only child out to a place and give him up as a sacrifice. Without hesitation, Abraham takes Isaac to the place of God’s request. Along the way, when questioned by Isaac about where the sacrificial lamb is, Abraham’s response is “God will provide.”
If only I had that type of faith. I would never have to worry about how bills would get paid, how all of my work will get finished on time during the school year, how I will get the jobs around the house all finished. I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. Jesus said that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, we could move mountains. I’m pretty sure much of the time, my faith is even smaller than that.
So my prayer for all of us today is that we grow in faith and trust in God’s plan for us. God will provide.